Feminism, Friendship and the Tarot

Submitted by Judy Rebick on Mon, 03/09/2009 - 8:28am

March 8 is International Women’s Day but in Toronto, it is the Saturday closest to March 8 that we celebrate and as I usually do I went to the rally and march that has been held every year since 1975. On Sunday March 8, I had lunch with my friend Velcrow on Toronto Island, where he lives.  I’ve been having some trouble healing from a leg injury that is causing me a lot of pain. I’ve been to the chiropractor, who made it worse, the massage therapist and the Chinese doctor who make it better for a day or two but it still it hurts. So Velcrow offered to do a Tarot reading for me. His version of Tarot is Jungian which means it helps you get to some of the psychological issues that might be blocking your way, in this case to healing.

 
 Velcrow’s one of my closest friends. His knows me well and is very insightful so I figure his Tarot readings are a structural way for him to help me to see myself better. But he insists it’s the Tarot not him. We live like this in our friendship. I interpret his spirituality through my lens and I learn a lot from him and I hope vice versa.   On the surface our interests and knowledge are very different but when we go deeper we find that we are often talking about the same thing using different language. Our dialogues on spirituality and politics have informed my new book Transforming Power and his new film FierceLight. I would trust him with my life.
 
Anyway we were in the restaurant on the island and some pretty heavy stuff was coming up in the Tarot. I noticed a woman sitting nearby was listening and I was thinking maybe we should retire to his house when the woman came over to the table. “Nice to see you on International Women’s Day, “ she said, recognizing me . “You are precious to us you know.”
 I thought , if I am so precious maybe you could leave me alone in what is obviously an intense conversation with my friend but I was polite and said  “Thanks” Then she said “be careful of him.”   Incredulous,  I responded, “You are trying to protect me from Velcrow?” “Yes” she answered.   She recommended a different Tarot book than what he was using, one written by two women, suggesting that somehow this male using a book written by a male could only steer me wrong.  “Well you are wrong. He and I are great friends, and I need no protection from him.” All the time thinking is this woman for real?
Velcrow laughed.  “You are really out of line here,” he told her and I was glad he did but she wasn’t listening.   , “I hope you have some good female energy around you today is, International Women’s Day, so it’s important,” she continued.  I am not sure why I didn’t just tell her to go to hell but I guess I’m too polite. So I replied, “I have lots of good women around me but today I am with Velcrow and I’m starting to think I need protection from you not from him.” Then she said, “Well you never know why someone comes into your life, maybe you better listen to me.” Unbelievable!
I’ve never been the kind of feminist who thinks women are somehow better than men.   I generally like men; although I’ve been disappointed by many. But I have never had a strange man invade my personal space quite so arrogantly as this women.     It was hard to go back to the Tarot reading after that but Velcrow and I had a great discussion about what’s fucked up about a certain kind of feminism and a certain kind of spirituality, once again realizing that dogma of whatever kind stops you from seeing what’s in front of your nose.    
I celebrate International Women’s Day not only because of all the wonderful women I know but the growing number of wonderful men.    If there is one thing I have learned over the last few decades of being feminist, it’s that women’ s liberation will never happen without dismantling patriarchy and we can’t do that without men who are willing to participate in that transformation by re-creating a new kind of masculinity that is nurturing  not domineering or violent. I am lucky enough to count men like this among my friends. 

 

Tags:

Woot

Submitted by Anonymous on Mon, 03/09/2009 - 1:31pm.
Well now you've done it! Everyone's going blame me for turning you woo woo! Actually I have as little patience for the over the top woo woo as you do, so the world is safe. We will not have a Judy Rebick teaching us pet chakra rebalancing any time soon, or me for that matter. But it has been wonderful the way we have learned to find the common ground between the spiritual and the activist ways of thinking. I believe there is enormous possibility and synergy when we can drop our old prejuidices and learn from our differences, and our friendship is a great testament to that. BTW I actually can't tell you exactly why the way I use Tarot cards to plumb the depths of the unconscious works, but I do know, as you can attest, that it does work. For me, it's not about trying to tell the future - I'm trying to understand the present. Carl Jung was also a big fan of the tarot cards, because of the archetypal imagery they contain - archetypes that can inform us on our own personal journey's of self understanding. I don't think it's the cards speaking exactly, nor is it just me - it's more of an interplay. And there's an element of mystery there, which perhaps is one of the things about spirituality that confounds the more rational minded political types. It asks us to consider possibilities beyond that which can be experienced with the five senses alone... And in other news - here's to men doing their part to help deconstruct the patriarchy! ~Velcrow Ripper

ferminism and tarot

Submitted by Anonymous on Mon, 03/09/2009 - 12:02pm.
This reminds me of the Ellen Jamesians in the World According to Garp. Those women who cut out their tongues and would only associate with other women.

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